The words gushing out of me: 17 de noviembre de 2013
I’m eating ice cream in the kitchen with the clocks ticking and an aloe vera plant in the corner. An almost-empty bottle of wine, a sepia toned world map on the wall, miniature pumpkins on the dining table. The words gushing out of me, triumphant, hungry, fresh, gleaming and glistening.
Today I got hella blunted and ran on the greenbelt, and I was thinking about human relationships, and philosophical things, like love. Because love, such a vague, overused, complicated concept. I was thinking, weed is what I’m in love with, and myself, because always after smoking I’m able to see myself more clearly and identify things about myself that I want to change to make my life better.
After smoking I always realize how things in my life influence and affect me and what I should do if I want to change those influences. Everything becomes so clear so quickly. Weeeeeeeed helps me be creative and productive and adaptable, to identify thought patterns and cognitive distortions I have without judgment or criticism or self-deprecation. Smoking pot is practicing objectivity and open mindedness. Haha, but seriously.
If I could find a human being that does all that, I would freak off my leash. I was thinking, ultimate respect is love, ultimate honesty, not trying to protect someone’s feelings and just saying exactly how you feel. That has to be love.
Whatever, I don’t love anyone.