North American anxiety: 08 de enero de 2015
Yesterday I wrote Sawyer a long email about my life right now, and how I don’t want to go back to the states because anxiety and unsureness and uncomfortability (I know it’s not a word but it is now) are…
Fernet and cola under the stars: 04 de enero de 2015
The start of my new year was kind of una mierda. New Year’s Eve we had the hostel to ourselves: Kate, who I played soccer with in college, chiquita, blonde hair, blue eyes, and the most beautiful clear skin, as…
I am skilled at listening, adjusting, adapting: 29 de diciembre de 2014
I feel like people just want to tell me everything. I am skilled at listening, adjusting, adapting, dancing around in their world until we’re chasing each other and I can’t stop the stream of questions funneling out of my mouth…
I feel like such an alien: 27 de diciembre de 2014
I feel like such an alien. I miss Raúl, but I’m mad at him for being so weirdly judgmental in a way. I don’t know where he is or what he’s doing. He has to be with Ximena, who I…
He comes to visit me at five in the morning: 26 de diciembre de 2014
He comes to visit me at five in the morning, he sits on the couch and I lay with my head in his lap, his fingers tracing lines, searching. We are silent, and it feels so nice to have someone…
I feel so magic: 13 de diciembre de 2014
I feel so new, I feel so magic, so feather-like floaty hair and pixelated pinpointed pulseras, colours in every texture. Ink on skin, plastic camera whimsical vibrations, a ring on every finger, long nails, eating a bulbous, shiny apple, reds…
Cocaína y LSD: 14 de diciembre de 2014
Last night we snorted cocaine, drank only un poquito, and later took a fourth of a tab of LSD, un trip, before going to Belle Epoche, an electronic bar. It was hours of pure insanity, your soul wrenched in every…
I feel creativity buzzing inside everything: 12 de diciembre de 2014
My brain is starting to clog with inspiration and excitement. I feel so attractive here, so surrounded by beautiful, fashionable people that look at me like I am one of them, another work of art to be respected and admired.…
I feel I am a new being, everything before is only a shadow in the past: 11 de diciembre de 2014
I feel my head full of tension, a stress reaction to the paratoxicity that is the only form of marijuana that is cheap-ish and usually available. Paraguayo, no flores. Hay que cortarlo como si fuera una barra de pan. I…
I have so much to analyze, to brainstorm, to invent: 09 de diciembre de 2014
I have so much to analyze, to brainstorm, to invent. I’m in Mendoza, a perfect temperature night. The swollen summer heat has deflated into a dark coolness with an occasional warm breeze. I’m drinking Fernet and Cola, Chiki watches the…